Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’
Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, widely known in the world of satire by his pen name ‘Uratipt’, expresses his emotions and thoughts with profound honesty and depth. His multifaceted talent is evident in his contributions across various literary genres. He is not only a renowned satirist but also a poet and a children’s author.
His satirical writings have earned him a special place in the literary world. His satire, ‘Shikshak Ki Mout’, went massively viral on the Sahitya Aajtak channel, garnering over a million views and reads—a monumental achievement in the history of Hindi satire. His collection of satires, ‘Ek Tinka Ikyavan Aankhen’ (A Straw and Fifty-One Eyes), is also highly acclaimed and includes his timeless work, ‘Kitabon Ki Antim Yatra’ (The Last Journey of Books). Other celebrated collections include ‘Mayaan Ek, Talwar Anek’ (One Sheath, Many Swords), ‘Gapodi Adda’ (The Gossiper’s Den), and ‘Sab Rang Mein Mere Rang’ (My Colors in Every Hue). His satirical novel, ‘Idhar-Udhar Ke Beech Mein’ (In Between Here and There), is a unique and groundbreaking work focused on the third world.
His significant contributions to literature have been widely recognized. He was honored with the Best Young Creator Award, 2021 by the Telangana Hindi Academy and the Government of Telangana, an award presented by Chief Minister K. Chandrasekhar Rao. The Rajasthan Children’s Literature Academy also honored him for his children’s book, ‘Nanhon Ka Srijan Aasmaan’ (The Creative Sky of Little Ones). Additionally, he has received the Vyanga Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Sopaan Samman and the Sahitya Srijan Samman from Prime Minister Narendra Modi.
Dr. Uratript has also played a pivotal role in writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Government of Telangana for primary school, college, and university levels. His work is included in university textbooks in Bihar, Chhattisgarh, and Telangana, where his satirical creations are part of the curriculum. This recognition underscores that young readers can identify and appreciate quality and impactful writing.
Key Accolades and Works
- Viral Satire: ‘Teacher’s Death’ (over 1 million views)
- Satire Collections: ‘Ek Tinka Ikyavan Aankhen’, ‘Mayaan Ek, Talwar Anek’, ‘Gapodi Adda’
- Unique Satirical Novel: ‘Idhar-Udar Ke Beech Mein’
- Awards: Shreshtha Navyuva Samman (Telangana), Sahitya Srijan Samman (PM Modi), and more.
- Educational Contribution: Authored and edited 55 books for the Telangana government.
Some precious moments of life
- Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
- Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
- Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
- Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
- Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.
Today we present his satire The Coffee Machine Protocol.
☆ Witful Warmth# 110 ☆
☆ Satire ☆ The Coffee Machine Protocol… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆
At the tech startup InnovateX, the employee hierarchy was not determined by job titles, salary packages, or the size of one’s cubicle. It was strictly determined by who knew how to operate the imported, hyper-complex Italian espresso machine in the cafeteria.
The machine looked like a mini spaceship, complete with steam wands, pressure gauges, and sixteen confusing buttons labeled in Italian. Most employees settled for the basic instantly-brewed powdered coffee, which tasted like melted cardboard. Only the CTO, Mr. Alex, had mastered the secret art of brewing the perfect espresso.
Enter Kabir, a newly joined junior developer whose dedication to caffeine was bordering on a spiritual quest. Kabir made it his life’s mission to crack the coffee machine protocol. For three weeks, he secretly observed Mr. Alex from behind a pillar, taking detailed notes on the exact sequence of button presses, milk frothing angles, and coffee bean compression.
On a rainy Thursday afternoon, the cafeteria was empty except for Kabir. He stepped up to the massive stainless-steel machine. His fingers hovered over the buttons like a pianist preparing for a symphony. He pressed the red lever, turned the steam valve exactly forty-five degrees, and pushed the mysterious button marked ‘Espresso Supremo’.
The machine hissed, roared like a sleepy dragon, and suddenly began pouring a rich, dark liquid with a velvety golden froth. Kabir’s eyes widened in pure triumph. He had done it. He held the golden cup of victory in his hands.
Just as he took his first sip, the cafeteria door burst open. In walked the CEO, accompanied by three high-profile venture capitalists who were considering investing ten million dollars in the startup.
The CEO looked flustered. “Ah, gentlemen! Let me treat you to our famous artisanal coffee before the pitch.” He turned to Kabir with an anxious expression. “Kabir, right? Is Mr. Alex around? None of us know how to use this monster.”
Kabir calmly took another sip, adjusted his glasses, and said, “Mr. Alex is in a meeting, sir. But I can handle this.”
With supreme confidence, Kabir operated the machine like a master barista, preparing four perfect cappuccinos in under five minutes. He served them on a tray with a subtle, professional smile. The investors took a sip, and their faces lit up with absolute delight.
“Remarkable!” the lead investor exclaimed. “If your company pays this much attention to detail in its coffee, your code must be flawless. Where do we sign?”
The deal was finalized that very afternoon. During the celebration party, the CEO raised his glass and announced, “We are promoting Kabir to Lead Systems Architect today!”
When Kabir looked confused, the CEO whispered in his ear, “We don’t care about your coding, Kabir, but we cannot afford to lose the only person who keeps our investors caffeinated.”
The entire office broke into roaring laughter and applause, raising their coffee cups to the new master of the Italian spaceship.
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© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’
Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com
≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈
