English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 63 – The Felicitation Ceremony of Sixty-Year-Old Mischief… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire The Felicitation Ceremony of Sixty-Year-Old Mischief 

☆ Witful Warmth# 63 ☆

☆ Satire ☆ The Felicitation Ceremony of Sixty-Year-Old Mischief… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

From dusty villages to the capital itself, there was a buzz: the Sahitya Akademi was about to host a “historic” program. The declared theme—“The Transitional Phase of Hindi Satire.” But the real spice lay elsewhere: the welcome speech was to be delivered by none other than the Secretary himself, whose mischief had turned a glorious sixty this year. Now you may ask—how can mischief ever grow old? Dear sir, in this land everything is cause for celebration. Some pour ghee in temples, some blow out candles on birthdays, and some—having made people’s lives hell for a good sixty years—get their mischief felicitated. The Akademi was all set to print invitations saying—“Diamond Jubilee of the Secretary’s Mischief.” But then they feared a cart of rotten tomatoes might decorate the hall’s entrance, so they softened it to the safer title of “Transitional Phase.”

On the day of the grand function, the hall looked like a theatre of absurdity. Outside, giant hoardings screamed—“Welcome the Transitional Phase!” Inside, a velvet-red table gleamed with flowers arranged into the number “60.” The Secretary waddled in, belly leading the way, and collapsed into the chair like a crowned king of Mischief on the day of coronation. On the wall, Parsai’s portrait hung, his eyes seemingly whispering, “Look at this—the offspring of my satire adorning with garlands the very man throttling its neck!” The litterateurs seated in the audience muffled their laughter, but not because the joke was funny—because they feared shoes might really start flying. The anchor on the mic boomed, “Today, present among us is a personality of great experience, our venerable Secretary!” I bit my tongue. Oh, to shout aloud—“Experience in what? Theft? Hypocrisy? Or simply decades of mischief?”

When the Secretary rose to speak, even the tube-lights on stage flickered nervously. Behind those thick glasses, his eyes glistened with the polished shamelessness of a thief declaring, “I’m here to dispense justice.” He began, “Friends, satire is going through a difficult transitional phase. We must preserve it.” The hall burst into applause. Just imagine: the man whose antics stick to every street corner like unpaid electricity bills, now sermonizing about saving satire! This is the real infection—when scoundrels start preaching piety. Each word from his mouth felt tugged by some invisible hand of falsehood, and the audience swallowed it whole as if it were divine truth.

The real comedy, however, was the row of writers nodding on stage. One bobbed his head mechanically—as though agreeing was a childhood habit. Another bowed so incessantly it felt like he was attending a villain’s wedding, willy-nilly playing the role of a dancing guest. One writer whispered over his teacup, “Friend, sharing the stage is mere compulsion.” Another muttered, “We’re here for literature, not the man.” It sounded as though they’d equated man with a sewer and literature with the Ganges, and happily stirred both into the same pot. This “transition” was not illness of language—it was a cold in the very soul. Satire, strong as steel in Parsai’s hands, was now wrapped and suffocated in the coffin of silence, while the Secretary sat beaming—his sixty years of mischief officially academic.

The richest satire, though, festered outside in the crowd. People came armed with baskets of rotten eggs, dead tomatoes, and ancient slippers. “This is the true way to welcome him,” someone chuckled. Another whispered, “Wait and watch—the speech will soon be decorated with red eggs.” But the guards were vigilant, standing stiff as if they were democracy’s gatekeepers, confiscating shoes like contraband and tossing them into a lockup. Inside, the Secretary smoothed out the creases in his pristine white kurta, while outside, democracy’s voice was stripped barefoot. Such is the state of satire today: when shoes on your feet are blessed for temple darshan, but the moment the same shoes arc majestically toward a rogue’s forehead, the hall calls it an outrage. The air inside smelled like rotten potatoes hidden under roses.

The Secretary’s speech dragged on and on. Louder even than his words was his laughter—that laughter bought with contractors’ cash, that laughter that salts the wounds of the wronged, that laughter awarded for six decades of perfected deceit. The writers sat listening as though the laughter itself were a bitter medicine they were compelled to swallow. Behind their frozen faces lurked fear. They knew too well—oppose him, and the foreword to their next book will be penned by someone else entirely. Better keep the pen locked in the pocket. Satire was no longer literature; it had withered into the stench of this hall. Each of his sentences crackled like an electric shock—writers clapped, not out of agreement, but as living insulators protecting themselves from electrocution.

If one calls this a “transition,” then this it is: the court silent, the stage dumb, the victim abandoned. Her cries clung mute to the peeling walls like forgotten posters. Each clap in the hall dropped another tear from her eyes. In those tears drowned pages of literature, while floating upon them was the mocking silhouette of his laughter. Shoes waited outside for justice, but inside, satire was lynched. This was no academic ceremony—it was satire’s funeral procession. Only difference—here the mourners showered not flowers but empty words, and the corpse was the pen itself, once sharpened by Parsai, now rusted into a party spoon tucked in the Secretary’s pocket.

When the event concluded, the writers eagerly posed for photographs. The Secretary smiled, flowers rained, and shoes languished in their lock-up prison, denied their rightful protest. Off to the side stood a woman, silent. Swollen eyes, cracked lips, broken heart—she was the one branded guilty. Her tears alone scripted the real text of this ceremony. On stage claps thundered, but within her chest roared endless screams. It was in that scream that satire’s final word was etched: “The Secretary’s mischief may have completed sixty years, but justice remains an orphan.” And as we exited the hall, it seemed Parsai himself whispered from the walls—“Satire is dead, my friends. Not even shoes were granted to perform its last rites.” The echo of that slap still lingered in the air

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Poetry ☆ Cosmic Puppeteer… ☆ Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ☆

Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM

(Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi —an ex Naval Officer, possesses a multifaceted personality. He served as a Senior Advisor in prestigious Supercomputer organisation C-DAC, Pune. He was involved in various Artificial Intelligence and High-Performance Computing projects of national and international repute. He has got a long experience in the field of ‘Natural Language Processing’, especially, in the domain of Machine Translation. He has taken the mantle of translating the timeless beauties of Indian literature upon himself so that it reaches across the globe. He has also undertaken translation work for Shri Narendra Modi, the Hon’ble Prime Minister of India, which was highly appreciated by him. He is also a member of ‘Bombay Film Writer Association’.

We present Capt. Pravin Raghuvanshi ji’s amazing poem “~ Cosmic Puppeteer ~.  We extend our heartiest thanks to the learned author Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi Ji (who is very well conversant with Hindi, Sanskrit, English and Urdu languages) and his artwork.) 

? ~ Cosmic Puppeteer??

In the divine cosmic hands,

a conch shell’s gentle sway

Echoes the ocean’s heartbeat,

in  a  mystic  primal  way

I too, yearned to dive into

the dark, ever fertile sea

Where existence’s mysteries

whispered secrets to me

 *

But Time’s Master Puppeteer

wove a discrete fate’s might

Rolling the dice of destiny, to

guide through endless night

 * 

Like autumn leaves, our desires

scattered far and wide

Cacti bloomed where mangroves

once stood, side by side

 *

The river’s flow, a soft melody

that we could never become

The ocean’s vast endless expanse

an  unachievable  freedom

 *

Our castles in the air, shattered,

lost  to  the  stormy  wind

A testament to fate’s whispers,

for hearts to mind and grind

 *

Our castles in the air, shattered,

lost to the gale’s war cry

A testament to fate’s whispers,

for hearts to ponder & imply

~Pravin Raghuvanshi

 © Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM

Pune

≈ Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 62 – The Demise of a Merit-Less Soul… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire The Demise of a Merit-Less Soul 

☆ Witful Warmth# 62 ☆

☆ Satire ☆ The Demise of a Merit-Less Soul… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

The news arrived not as a tragedy, but as a statistical anomaly. It was a Tuesday morning when the principal’s office received the official report on the demise of Student Number 16, a fact conveyed in a tone befitting a clerical error. The student, it was noted, had simply ceased to be. His final moments were not of despair, but of a quiet, meticulous calculation of failure. His mind, having processed the impossibility of achieving a 99.8% average, had logically concluded that a successful life was no longer a viable option. It was a pragmatic decision, devoid of melodrama or romanticism. The school, in its infinite wisdom, immediately formed an Ad Hoc Committee for the Management of Unforeseen Demises. The committee’s primary task was not to mourn or to understand, but to ensure that the student’s failure did not tarnish the school’s pristine record. The chairman, a man with a mind as sharp and as cold as a freshly honed pencil, instructed the clerk to remove the student’s file from the “Exemplary” category and place it directly into the “Statistical Anomaly” box. The whole affair was handled with the same cold efficiency as a bank processing a loan rejection.

The student’s parents, upon hearing the news, did not shed a single tear. Tears, they reasoned, were a useless expenditure of valuable bodily fluids. Their initial reaction was a financial one. “All that money,” the father lamented, “spent on coaching classes, on tutors for mathematics and physics, on the late-night snacks to fuel his futile efforts. It’s a complete loss of investment. The ROI is zero, perhaps even negative.” The mother, ever the pragmatist, immediately called the tuition center to demand a refund. “My son’s demise,” she explained to the bewildered receptionist, “is a clear indication of your teaching’s ineffectiveness. The guarantee was for success, not for a permanent withdrawal from the rat race.” They held a small, formal gathering where relatives offered condolences not on the loss of life, but on the loss of a future doctor or engineer. “Such a pity,” an aunt sighed, “all that potential, all those perfectly good notebooks, now wasted.” The entire conversation revolved around the monetary value of a life that had, in their eyes, become an economic liability.

The neighbors, who had previously praised the student as a diligent boy with a promising future, now spoke of him in hushed, judgmental tones. He was no longer a symbol of hope but a cautionary tale, a social scarecrow erected to frighten their own children into submission. “You see what happens,” a father whispered to his son, his voice thick with implied threat, “when you don’t score well? The pressure becomes too much. It’s better to just study hard now and avoid such an outcome.” The story of Student Number 16 was added to the national curriculum of parental warnings, alongside anecdotes of children who had run away from home for daring to express an interest in art or music. His demise, in a strange, bureaucratic twist of fate, had finally given his life a purpose: to serve as a negative example. He was now more useful to society as a statistic of failure than he ever was as a living, breathing human being. His existence, a brief and frantic sprint toward a finish line he could never reach, had culminated in a final, impactful act of non-existence that served the very system that had consumed him.

The local government, ever eager to be seen as proactive, swiftly announced the formation of the “Bureaucracy of Student Well-being and Protocol for Terminal Academic Exhaustion.” The new department was a shining example of officialdom at its finest: an elaborate building, a dedicated staff, and a mountain of paperwork. The first order of business was to draft a 500-page report on the incident, a document that would contain not a single word about the human cost. The report would instead focus on procedural failures, such as the student’s failure to submit a “Pre-Demise Intention Form” and the school’s neglect in providing a “Certified Stress Mitigation Counselor” with a valid license to counsel. The report’s conclusion was not to recommend a change in the education system, but to suggest a new, mandatory module on “Emotional Resilience and the Proper Filing of Grievances” for all students. The student’s demise was thus transformed from a tragedy into a job-creation scheme, an administrative triumph of form over substance.

The media, sensing a juicy story, descended like vultures on the school. A television news anchor, his face a perfect mask of manufactured concern, delivered a dramatic monologue. “Today,” he declared, “we mourn the loss of a young life, a victim of our cutthroat education system.” The segment then seamlessly cut to a commercial break for a new, “stress-free” online tutoring service. The debate on the news channels was not about the pressures on students, but about whether the student’s demise was a political conspiracy or a case of poor parenting. Experts with impressive-sounding degrees were brought in to pontificate on the psychology of failure, while the student’s actual humanity was completely lost in the noise. His life story was edited, polished, and packaged for maximum viewership, stripped of all its complexity and emotional truth. He was no longer a person who had suffered, but a media product to be consumed and discussed for a week before the next sensational story replaced him. The public, for its part, absorbed the drama and moved on, their collective conscience soothed by the brief, performative act of “caring.”

In a final act of grotesque absurdity, the school decided to posthumously award Student Number 16 with the “Pinnacle of Academic Dedication” medal. The principal, addressing a solemn assembly, praised the student’s “unwavering commitment to the pursuit of excellence, a commitment so profound that he was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for the sanctity of the academic system.” The medal, a shiny, circular piece of metal, was accepted by his parents who, for the first time, smiled. Their son had finally brought them something of value—a shiny token and a fleeting moment of social prestige. The school also announced the establishment of a new “Student Demise Prevention Cell,” but the official notice for the cell’s inauguration was printed on the same page as a full-page advertisement for the school’s new, advanced robotics lab. The cell’s first act was to issue a new, comprehensive set of forms for students to fill out regarding their mental state, a bureaucratic solution to a human problem.

The demise of Student Number 16, in the end, was not a sad event. It was, instead, a logistical success. The school’s reputation was saved, the government had created a new department, the parents had received a consolation prize, and the media had a week’s worth of content. His story became a footnote in the grand, unfeeling ledger of the education system, a small, inconsequential line item in the column marked “Failed Experiments.” His memory was preserved not as a person who had dreamed, struggled, and fallen, but as a statistical object lesson for the next generation of students. He was a martyr to a cause that didn’t care about him, a sacrifice offered on the altar of a system that demanded perfection but offered no grace. The system had won. The demise of the student was a small price to pay for the smooth, uninterrupted functioning of the machine.

And so, life went on. The school bell rang, the students crammed for their exams, and the parents continued to invest in a future of predictable returns. The story of Student Number 16 was filed away in a drawer, alongside other irrelevant documents. The irony of it all was that his demise, which should have served as a wake-up call, had instead been absorbed by the very system it was a symptom of. His quiet exit had become just another part of the noise. And somewhere, another student, with tired eyes and a mind full of impossible expectations, was calculating their own odds of survival. The cycle had been completed, the lesson had been taught, and the machine, well-oiled by apathy and ambition, was ready for its next meal.

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Memoir ☆ दस्तावेज़ # 38 ☆ 50 Years Later: A Walk Down My College’s Memory Lane  ☆ Shri Hemant Tarey ☆ 

Shri Hemant Tarey

(This is an effort to preserve old invaluable and historical memories through e-abhivyakti’s “दस्तावेज़” series. In the words of Shri Jagat Singh Bisht Ji – “The present is being recorded on the Internet in some form or the other. But some earlier memories related to parents, grandparents, their lifetime achievements are slowly fading and getting forgotten. It is our responsibility to document them in time. Our generation can do this else nobody will know the history and everything will be forgotten.”

In the next part of this series, we present a memoir by Shri Hemant Tarey Ji 50 Years Later: A Walk Down My College’s Memory Lane .“)

☆ दस्तावेज़ # 27 – 50 Years Later: A Walk Down My College’s Memory Lane ☆ Shri Hemant Tarey ☆

Last week, I was at my home town, Ratlam in connection with Mahalaxmi Pujan.

It so happened that on the way to Ratlam, while talking to my wife, about my childhoid, School, & College days in Ratlam, it suddenly occurred to me that I passed out with my M.Sc. degree from Ratlam college in 1975 and today we are in 2025. Hollyshit, that means it translates to 50 years when I attended the Ratlam college last. With this new found thought, I resolved to myself that I am going to visit my college by stealing few hours out of my short stay at Ratlam. I was thrilled at the idea that I would be seeing for myself as to how the college building looks like after 50 years of my last day in the college.

My younger brother, who also graduated from the very same college, accompanied me on my sojourn to the College and no sooner we stepped into the College campus, memories started to unfold, one after another. On my right was Two wheeler stand where good number of Scooters, Motor cycles etc were lined up as contrast to those good old days, when right at the same spot we used to park our Cycles. This area those days was designated as Cycle stand (as opposed to Two Wheeler Stand) for the simple reason that the area used to be cramped with cycles only those days 😁.

We walked few steps further and soon we were walking along the college main building. With an intent to savour beauty of my college as I glanced at the building I was saddened to see many- many flex posters pasted on the walls, all of which read “ABANDONED”. I almost fainted to see these posters, as I had never imagined that my eyes would meet any such writing on the college walls which would make me almost cry. I continued walking with my brother towards Science Block which used to house Deptt of Physics and Chemistry in our days of yore. I was really praying and saying to myself that I am not going to see any more such ugly posters on the walls of Science Block of the college. My heart was pouncing as we reached the block, my frightened eyes scanning the walls of the science block and hopping that eyes don’t meet the poster which I hated most to look at. I was lucky, though the walls of the Science Block showed signs of wear and tear and having suffered vagaries of weather, fortunately, there were no ugly posters which I had seen few minutes ago on the walls of the Arts and Commerce Block of the College. I entered the Departmed of Chemistry which hosted my two years of M Sc. i.e. 1974- 75 and 1975-76. While strolling the alley ways of the Department, I relived two years of my M.Sc., my days with classmates, the Professors, the Laboratory, the girls 😜 and visits to Samosa shop of Sahu. We also took a stroll of the Department of Physics where we met 2- 3 faculty and HOD of Physics. All of them welcomed us and were surprised to see a student of the Department of Chemistry who passed out in 1975. When we talked about the frightening and ugly “ABONDENED” Posters on the walls of the Arts and Commerece wing of the college, they could feel the emotions we were passing through and consoled us by saying that just 800 meters away new building for Arts and Commerce faculty has since been erected and from this academic session itself, this building will start housing classes for Arts and Commerce students.

After taking tour of the Alma mater and reliving the nostalgia to the hilt, we left the premises and started our journey back home.

♥♥♥♥

© Hemant Tarey

मो.  8989792935

≈ Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 61 – The Dog: A Citizen of the Republic of Irony… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire The Dog: A Citizen of the Republic of Irony 

☆ Witful Warmth# 61 ☆

☆ Satire ☆ The Dog: A Citizen of the Republic of Irony… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

The dog is not merely an animal. He is a metaphor, a social commentary, a walking editorial. He is the only creature who can wag his tail and still be taken seriously. In our society, the dog has transcended biology and entered politics, bureaucracy, and even philosophy. He is the mascot of loyalty, the symbol of servitude, and the ambassador of absurdity. When a dog barks, it is not just noise—it is a protest, a press conference, a parliamentary debate. And when he bites, it is not violence—it is policy implementation. The dog is the only citizen who can roam freely, bark at authority, and still be fed by the very system he disrupts. In this republic of irony, the dog is not beneath us. He is among us. Sometimes, he is above us. He is the minister’s pet, the bureaucrat’s companion, the influencer’s accessory, and the common man’s mirror. If Harishankar Parsai were alive today, he would not write about the dog. He would interview him. Because the dog knows everything. He has seen everything. He has sniffed every scandal, marked every boundary, and slept through every revolution. He is not just a creature. He is a commentary.

The dog’s loyalty is legendary. But loyalty to whom? To the master, of course. The master may be corrupt, cruel, or criminal—but the dog remains loyal. This is not loyalty. This is conditioning. And this conditioning is not limited to dogs. Citizens too are conditioned. They vote loyally, cheer loyally, and suffer loyally. The dog licks the master’s boots. The citizen licks the master’s slogans. The dog wags his tail. The citizen waves his flag. Both are symbols of submission. The dog does not question authority. Neither does the voter. The dog is trained to sit, stay, and roll over. The citizen is trained to obey, pay, and rollover EMIs. The dog’s loyalty is rewarded with biscuits. The citizen’s loyalty is rewarded with promises. Both are edible, but only one is digestible. The dog is loyal because he knows no better. The citizen is loyal because he fears worse. In this democracy, loyalty is not a virtue—it is a survival tactic. And the dog is its most honest practitioner. He does not pretend to be free. He knows he is owned. The citizen, however, lives in the illusion of freedom, wagging his rights like a tail, unaware that the leash is constitutional.

The dog barks. It is his right. It is also his duty. He barks at strangers, at shadows, at silence. He barks to assert territory, to express anxiety, to demand attention. The citizen too barks—on social media, in drawing rooms, at news anchors. But his bark is hollow. It lacks teeth. The dog’s bark may not bite, but it warns. The citizen’s bark is often just noise. The dog barks at injustice instinctively. The citizen barks at injustice selectively. The dog does not need a trending hashtag to protest. He needs a reason. The citizen needs a camera. The dog’s bark is raw, unfiltered, and honest. The citizen’s bark is rehearsed, edited, and monetized. The dog barks even when no one listens. The citizen barks only when someone retweets. In this age of performative outrage, the dog remains authentic. He does not bark for likes. He barks for survival. And when he stops barking, it is not peace—it is resignation. The dog teaches us that silence is not always golden. Sometimes, it is dangerous. Because when the dog stops barking, the thief enters. And when the citizen stops barking, the tyrant wins.

The dog bites. Not always. But when he does, it is decisive. He does not issue warnings. He does not file petitions. He bites. And then he moves on. The citizen, however, does not bite. He debates. He discusses. He defers. The dog bites when provoked. The citizen tolerates when provoked. The dog’s bite is a reaction. The citizen’s inaction is a tradition. The dog bites the hand that hits him. The citizen kisses the hand that robs him. The dog is not diplomatic. He is direct. The citizen is not direct. He is domesticated. The dog bites and faces consequences. The citizen suffers and writes poetry. In this society, biting is rebellion. And rebellion is discouraged. The dog is punished for biting. The citizen is rewarded for bleeding quietly. The dog’s bite is a statement. The citizen’s silence is a compromise. The dog teaches us that sometimes, resistance must be physical. That sometimes, the only way to be heard is to bite. But we have forgotten how to bite. We have become toothless patriots, wagging our tongues instead of our tails, barking at each other instead of the system. The dog remains the last revolutionary.

The dog sleeps. Anywhere. Everywhere. He sleeps on footpaths, under cars, beside garbage bins. He sleeps without guilt, without shame, without apology. The citizen too sleeps—through elections, through scams, through speeches. But his sleep is not restful. It is strategic. The dog sleeps because he is tired. The citizen sleeps because he is indifferent. The dog wakes up when danger approaches. The citizen wakes up when Netflix buffers. The dog’s sleep is innocent. The citizen’s sleep is complicit. The dog does not dream of democracy. He dreams of bones. The citizen dreams of democracy but settles for discounts. The dog sleeps in the open, vulnerable yet free. The citizen sleeps in gated colonies, secure yet caged. The dog’s sleep is a pause. The citizen’s sleep is an escape. In this nation of sleepers, the dog is the only one who wakes up for a reason. He wakes up to bark, to bite, to chase. The citizen wakes up to complain, to consume, to conform. The dog teaches us that sleep is necessary, but awakening is urgent. That rest is not resignation. That dreams must be chased, not just dreamt. But we continue to sleep—through injustice, through inequality, through incompetence—hoping someone else will bark.

The dog runs. Behind cars, cycles, cats, and sometimes, his own tail. He runs without purpose, without destination, without GPS. The citizen too runs—behind jobs, behind leaders, behind trends. But his run is not free. It is forced. The dog runs because he can. The citizen runs because he must. The dog’s run is chaotic but joyful. The citizen’s run is structured but stressful. The dog does not run for medals. He runs for movement. The citizen runs for validation. The dog runs even when he knows he won’t catch the car. The citizen runs even when he knows he won’t catch a break. The dog’s run is a metaphor for freedom. The citizen’s run is a metaphor for fatigue. In this race of rats, the dog remains a stray. He does not follow lanes. He does not obey signals. He runs because the road is his. The citizen runs because the system demands it. The dog teaches us that running is not always progress. That speed is not always success. That chasing is not always achieving. But we continue to run—on treadmills of ambition, on highways of illusion—forgetting that sometimes, the joy is in the run, not the result.

The dog is homeless. Technically. But he is not rootless. He belongs to every street, every corner, every chai stall. The citizen has homes, but no belonging. He lives in apartments, but not in communities. The dog is greeted by name—Sheru, Tommy, Moti. The citizen is greeted by designation—Sir, Ma’am, Boss. The dog is remembered for his bark. The citizen is remembered for his LinkedIn. The dog is fed by strangers. The citizen is ignored by neighbors. The dog finds warmth in winter, shade in summer, and food in festivals. The citizen finds EMI in winter, bills in summer, and stress in festivals. The dog is poor, but not pitiful. The citizen is rich, but not restful. In this urban jungle, the dog survives. The citizen struggles. The dog teaches us that home is not a building. It is a feeling. That belonging is not ownership. It is acceptance. That community is not WhatsApp groups. It is shared silence, shared space, shared stories. But we continue to build walls, install cameras, and forget names. The dog remains the only one who knows everyone, greets everyone, and trusts everyone. He is homeless, but never alone.

The dog dies. Quietly. On roads, in drains, under wheels. No obituary. No condolence. No trending hashtag. The citizen too dies—sometimes loudly, sometimes invisibly. But his death is documented. The dog’s death is deleted. The citizen’s death is debated. The dog dies without insurance. The citizen dies with policies. The dog dies because he lived freely. The citizen dies because he lived fearfully. The dog’s death is a statistic. The citizen’s death is a story. But both are forgotten. The dog teaches us that death is not the end. It is the punctuation. That life must be barked, bitten, and run. That silence is not peace—it is absence. That freedom is not safety—it is risk. But we do not learn. We mourn selectively. We remember conveniently. We live cautiously. So let us not dismiss the dog as a mere street nuisance or a loyal pet. He is our reflection—raw, unfiltered, and inconvenient. He barks when we whisper, bites when we beg, and sleeps when we pretend to be awake. In his wagging tail lies our conditioned obedience, in his bark our suppressed dissent, and in his bite our forgotten courage. The dog does not wear masks of civility; he exposes the farce of our own. He does not seek approval; he demands attention. And in doing so, he becomes the most honest citizen of this republic—unregistered, uncelebrated, but unforgettable. If we truly wish to evolve as a society, perhaps we must stop taming the dog and start learning from him. Because in a world where silence is rewarded and obedience is sold as virtue, the dog reminds us—sometimes, to be truly human, one must dare to bark.

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 60 – Surveillance Circus: Big Brother’s Mistress… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire Surveillance Circus: Big Brother’s Mistress 

☆ Witful Warmth# 60 ☆

☆ Satire ☆ Surveillance Circus: Big Brother’s Mistress… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

In the grand theatre of life, where privacy once danced freely like a shy bride, the Surveillance Circus now parades arrogantly, with Big Brother as its stern ringmaster and every citizen transformed into performers under his unblinking gaze. The show is open to all, and the tickets are mandatory—sold without choice or consent, wrapped in glossy promises of security and protection. Cameras, drones, data trackers, and unseen algorithms choreograph this relentless spectacle, turning every gesture, whisper, and click into a prize-winning act for an insatiable audience. The world has become a vast coliseum where personal space is auctioned to the highest bidder, and secrets no longer whisper but scream under neon lights. The circus tent is vast, but its scent is suffocating, and the spectators, once curious, now weep in silent despair behind forced smiles.

Here, laughter is recorded, and tears are streamed for the endless database. The joke is on the citizens, who, invited under the guise of safety, find themselves stripped of dignity and autonomy. “Big Brother cares,” they chant, as their lives become scripts rewritten by unseen scribes thirsting for control. The ringmaster boasts of order and peace, but the true show is a tragic comedy—a ballet of fear and submission where dissent is the jester silenced by digital shackles. Children grow up knowing their play is watched; lovers whisper knowing the microphones lurk. The circus pets are no longer exotic creatures but ordinary people—tracked, catalogued, analyzed, and often forgotten amid the data flood.

The clowns are technology companies, juggling profits with privacy, selling data in dazzling colors while masks of benevolence shield their greed. Promises abound of encryption and safeguards, yet every click baits another camera, every like feeds another drone. The audience applauds the convenience while ignoring the creeping loss of freedom, like rabbits hypnotized by the ringmaster’s flashing baton. Privacy policies shrink like a balloon in the hot sun, and consent is a puppet led by strings of legalese and confusion. Behind the scenes, algorithms decide who is trustworthy, who is suspicious, and who gets spotlighted under the harsh glare of scrutiny, often for the faintest reasons, or no reason at all.

In this circus, the tightrope walkers balance on thin lines of legality as governments and corporations perform dizzying acts, claiming transparency and compassion while ushering in relentless surveillance. Whistleblowers risk everything to reveal the tricks of the trade, only to be cast out as villains, warning that the performance endangers democracy itself. No ordinary citizen can choose to leave the show; opting out is an illusion, a disappearing act that vanishes under the weight of digital dependency. The crowd claps mechanically, both enthralled and terrified, trapped in a cycle where keystrokes are footprints in an open digital desert.

The audience’s laughter has long since turned into hollow echoes; the clapping is automated and scripted. Families dine with screens illuminating faces, unaware of the silent data harvesters shadowing each scroll and gesture. The illusion of privacy betrayed becomes an invisible yoke, yet many remain silent, numbed by the circus’s glare or distracted by its colorful lies. And in quiet moments, beneath the dazzling lights, tears fall—tears for the lost spaces where souls once wandered unfettered, for the fragile sanctuaries demolished by the voyeur’s lens. The spectacle has consumed humanity’s quiet corners as quietly as it stole its voices.

When the curtains finally fall, what remains of the spectacle? An empty ring littered with discarded freedoms, memories of a privacy that once was—a fallen mistress betrayed by her own captors. The cost of security is a cage where trust is shackled, and freedom is a faraway echo. The Surveillance Circus continues, relentless and unrepentant, reminding us that in this show, the greatest tragedy is not the spectacle itself but the audience that forgets it has the power to walk away. Only when the crowd weeps louder than it claps will the circus end, and the spirit of privacy return to dance once more in the open air.

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Poetry ☆ Life Lessons… ☆ Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ☆

Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM

(Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi —an ex Naval Officer, possesses a multifaceted personality. He served as a Senior Advisor in prestigious Supercomputer organisation C-DAC, Pune. He was involved in various Artificial Intelligence and High-Performance Computing projects of national and international repute. He has got a long experience in the field of ‘Natural Language Processing’, especially, in the domain of Machine Translation. He has taken the mantle of translating the timeless beauties of Indian literature upon himself so that it reaches across the globe. He has also undertaken translation work for Shri Narendra Modi, the Hon’ble Prime Minister of India, which was highly appreciated by him. He is also a member of ‘Bombay Film Writer Association’.

We present Capt. Pravin Raghuvanshi ji’s amazing poem “~ Life Lessons ~.  We extend our heartiest thanks to the learned author Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi Ji (who is very well conversant with Hindi, Sanskrit, English and Urdu languages) and his artwork.) 

? ~ Life Lessons… ??

Those who point fingers at others

often forget—

sooner or later, life hands them

a mirror as a gift…

Whenever you point a finger at someone,

remember this truth:

three fingers, silently but resolutely,

point back at you!

~Pravin Raghuvanshi

 © Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM

Pune

≈ Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Travelogue ☆ Mandu in the Monsoon – A Journey into Mist, Magic, and Melody ☆ Mr. Jagat Singh Bisht ☆


Shri Jagat Singh Bisht

(Master Teacher: Happiness & Well-Being, Laughter Yoga Master Trainer, Author, Blogger, Educator, and Speaker.)

Authored six books on happiness: Cultivating Happiness, Nirvana – The Highest Happiness, Meditate Like the Buddha, Mission Happiness, A Flourishing Life, and The Little Book of HappinessHe served in a bank for thirty-five years and has been propagating happiness and well-being among people for the past twenty years. He is on a mission – Mission Happiness!

🍀Mandu in the Monsoon – A Journey into Mist, Magic, and Melody🌧️🌈 ☆ Mr. Jagat Singh Bisht ☆

Being based in Indore, Mandu has never been far from me – a place I have often driven to with friends, or proudly shown to visiting guests. For years, it has stood in my heart as the most picturesque jewel around Indore. Yet, nothing – not even a hundred earlier visits – could prepare me for the divine spell Mandu cast upon me this time.

I had often heard whispers: “Go to Mandu in the monsoon, it is another world.” But I had not even dreamt of the bliss and magic awaiting us. The moment we ascended the plateau, it felt as if we had been transported to a heavenly, secret hill station – a place unnamed on any geographical map, tucked away in some corner of imagination and myth.

The clouds descended to play with us, wrapping the old stone palaces in veils of mist. Rain-washed monuments gleamed, spic and span, like brides dressed for a celestial wedding. From the edges of the plateau, the valley below lay in a blanket of emerald green, alive with the freshness of rain. The air carried the fragrance of wet earth, roasted bhuttas on roadside fires, and the promise of Malwa’s delicious cuisine waiting at every stop.

It was joy, pure and simple – the kind that seeps into the soul and stays there forever.

☘️Dhar – Between History and Art

Our route to Mandu took us first through Dhar, a city that still preserves echoes of its layered history. At the heart of this is the Bhojshala, a unique monument that defies easy definition. As per the guidelines of the Archaeological Survey of India, Muslims gather here for prayer on Fridays, while Hindus worship on Tuesdays and during the festival of Vasant Panchami, honouring Goddess Saraswati. On other days, it opens itself to visitors like us – curious wanderers eager to listen to its silent stories.

From there, we stepped into a different world altogether – the Phadke Art Studio. Established in 1933 by the gifted sculptor Raghunath Krishna Phadke, who had come to Dhar on the invitation of its king, this studio is no less than a temple of artistry. Every corner seemed alive with his creations: statues of freedom fighters like Mahatma Gandhi, Nehru, Tilak, and Raja Ram Mohan Roy, captured not as stiff memorials but as vibrant, breathing presences. Beside them stood exquisitely carved figures of kings, queens, and spiritual leaders, each narrating stories of power, devotion, or grace.

The experience became even more special when Phadke’s grandson himself guided us, sharing with affection and pride the intricate details of these masterpieces. It was as if the chiselled stone figures had begun whispering their secrets to us.

⛩️Mandu – Celebration in Stone

And then, Mandu!

If Dhar was a prelude, Mandu was the grand symphony. Every monument here seems carved out of joy itself, an ode to beauty and romance. The very air hums with the story of poet-prince Baz Bahadur and his beloved Rani Roopmati, whose palace still gazes wistfully over the Narmada valley. Their love, immortalised in ballads and folklore, lends the landscape a soft, haunting music, especially when the monsoon clouds gather and the peacocks cry.

Walking through Jahaz Mahal, Hindola Mahal, and the rain-kissed pavilions, one could almost hear forgotten songs echoing in the mist. Mandu, in the monsoon, is not just a place to see – it is a mood to live, a poem to feel.

🙋A Journey of Companionship

What is travel without companions? This journey became unforgettable not only because of the landscape but also because of the people who shared it. My heartfelt gratitude goes to Anand Bhave, who warmly invited us to join this wonderful group, and to Shravan Kumar Kanchan, whose flawless organisation ensured that every moment was smooth, lively, and memorable.

There was singing, laughter, and the warmth of conversations with fellow travellers – people bound by a shared love for trekking, exploring, and simply being happy in each other’s company.

🎬Epilogue – A Memory for the Ages

The return was by the Manpur route, but my mind was still wandering in the clouds of Mandu. It was as if the plateau had absorbed a part of my soul and gifted me, in return, something timeless – the memory of rain-drenched stones, the taste of roasted corn, the fragrance of wet winds, and the echo of love stories carved in stone.

Mandu in the monsoon is not just a destination. It is a celebration – of life, of joy, of love, and of nature’s grand theatre. It will remain etched in me as one of the most soul-satisfying experiences of my life.

© Jagat Singh Bisht

(Master Teacher: Happiness & Well-Being, Laughter Yoga Master Trainer, Author, Blogger, Educator, and Speaker.)

Founder:  LifeSkills

A Pathway to Authentic Happiness, Well-Being & A Fulfilling Life! We teach skills to lead a healthy, happy and meaningful life.

The Science of Happiness (Positive Psychology), Meditation, Yoga, Spirituality and Laughter Yoga. We conduct talks, seminars, workshops, retreats and training.

≈ Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 59 – Courtship License of ‘Dating’… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire Courtship License of ‘Dating’ 

☆ Witful Warmth# 59

☆ Satire ☆ Courtship License of ‘Dating’… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

It is a melancholy and universally acknowledged truth that our great nation is presently afflicted by a most grievous and perplexing social ill. I speak not of famine, nor of plague, nor of the endless and sanguinary conflicts across the seas, but of a far more insidious and subtle affliction that has seized the very marrow of our youthful population: the deplorable and utterly unproductive state of modern courtship.

For it hath been observed by all who are not blinded by a sentimentalist’s fog that the male youth of our realm, from the age of sixteen to a full three and twenty, are squandering the most fertile years of their lives in a manner so profligate and inefficient as to border upon national treason. They are ensnared in a web of digital pleasantries and fleeting interactions, a ceaseless and unavailing expenditure of both time and spirit, from which they derive no lasting benefit, and which, worse still, leaves them utterly unfit for the more rigorous and necessary duties of commerce and industry.

The cause of this lamentable state is readily identified, and it is with a heavy heart that I must place the blame squarely upon a new and peculiar species of the female gender, whom our society hath, in its modern jargon, denominated the ‘Gen-Z Girl’. This creature is of a constitution heretofore unseen in the annals of human relations: capricious, enigmatic, and possessed of a mind so given to novelties and fleeting fancies that to secure her interest for a period exceeding a fortnight is an undertaking of such Herculean proportions as to beggar the imagination.

She is, by nature and nurture, a mistress of the most baffling and esoteric forms of communication, whereby she may, through a single and ambiguous pictogram, convey a multitude of contradictory sentiments. The wretched suitor, in a state of perpetual confusion, is thereby rendered impotent to ascertain her true disposition, and is forced to resort to an endless and exhausting series of digital missives, each one composed with an anxious and feverish deliberation that would be better applied to the composition of state documents or the calculation of celestial mechanics. It is, furthermore, a common and disheartening occurrence for a gentleman to invest a full month’s worth of emotional and conversational labour, and even a considerable sum in the form of fine dining and theatrical amusements, only to find himself summarily ‘ghosted,’ a term which, though vulgar, aptly describes the sudden and inexplicable disappearance of the female subject, leaving no trace but a hollow echo in the digital ether.

Having given due consideration to this deplorable state of affairs, and having, over a period of some months, consulted with eminent sociologists, moral philosophers, and even several reputable professors of Applied Mathematics, I have at last devised a scheme so exquisitely simple in its design, and so universally beneficial in its effect, as to promise a complete and lasting remedy to this national calamity. My proposal is this: that we establish a national, state-regulated system for the management of courtship, reducing all interpersonal dealings to a series of quantifiable and strictly enforced commercial transactions.

To wit, let every male youth, upon reaching the age of majority, be issued a Courtship License, much in the manner of a permit for a firearm. This license shall contain his full particulars, and shall be linked to a national digital ledger. The Gen-Z girl, in turn, shall be issued a ‘Social Credit’ account, which may only be augmented by the successful completion of a courtship. The terms of engagement shall be clearly delineated by a central Bureau of Interpersonal Commerce, and all initial communications shall be restricted to a single, standardised digital protocol, devoid of all superfluous pleasantries and ambiguous pictograms. A suitor may, for a fee, initiate a conversation, and the Gen-Z girl is thereby obligated to respond within the space of three hours with either a direct rejection or an unequivocal invitation to proceed.

The ‘talking stage,’ that most dreadful and unproductive purgatory, shall be abolished forthwith. It shall be replaced with a series of tiered, contractual obligations. For example, a suitor may purchase the right to a twenty-minute, in-person conversation for a pre-determined sum, a portion of which shall be deposited directly into the Gen-Z girl’s Social Credit account. If the conversation proceeds with due diligence, he may then, for an escalated fee, secure a second, more lengthy engagement, and so forth. In this manner, all parties shall be assured of the sincerity of their counterparts, and the wasteful expenditure of time upon the indecisive or the frivolous shall be utterly eliminated.

The benefits of this scheme are manifold. Firstly, it shall provide a much-needed and dependable source of income for the female population, thereby reducing their reliance upon the precarious and often meager allowances of their parents, and stimulating the national economy with a constant flow of new capital. Secondly, it shall instill in the male youth a proper sense of the value of their time, compelling them to pursue their romantic interests with a purposeful and commercial vigour, rather than allowing them to languish in a state of idle and unprofitable communication. Thirdly, it shall, with the same stroke, encourage the Gen-Z girl to be more discerning and less whimsical in her dealings, for every successful transaction will add to her social credit and, by extension, to her eligibility for a more profitable match. The most efficient and productive of these young ladies shall be granted a premium license, allowing them to charge a higher rate for their time, and thereby ensuring that the most desirable and economically sound matches are made with the utmost expediency.

I am not unmindful that some sentimental souls, of a type who would weep over a lost kitten but show no such compassion for the plight of a nation’s youth, will object to this proposal as being a cruel and materialistic reduction of the sacred art of human love. To these tender-hearted critics, I would reply that their objections are founded upon a false and antiquated notion of courtship. For what is the current system but a game of chance played with loaded dice, a ruinous lottery in which the most worthy suitor may be passed over in favour of a fellow with a more impressive collection of digital images or a cleverer use of a fleeting internet phrase? My scheme, to the contrary, is founded upon the most sound and rational principles of commerce and utility, whereby all parties may enter into a transaction with a clear understanding of its terms and a realistic expectation of its outcome. It is, I submit, the most humane and compassionate system yet devised, for it puts a swift and merciful end to the protracted emotional suffering that is the inevitable result of the current system of irrational and unmanaged courtship.

Let us be honest with ourselves. The Gen-Z girl, with her peculiar habits and her bewildering lexicon of emojis and acronyms, has unwittingly created a social crisis of the first order. She has, through her very nature, rendered the traditional methods of courtship obsolete and ruinous. My proposal is not to change her nature—for that would be a task for a divine power—but to provide a framework within which her peculiar habits may be rendered productive and, dare I say it, profitable for all. This is not a proposal for the sale of sentiment, but for the efficient management of a vital social function, and thereby the restoration of order and purpose to a generation lost in a fog of digital confusion and emotional indolence.

This scheme, though simple in its conception, is of such profound and universal benefit that I would wager my last penny upon its success. I have no personal motive in this matter, for I am a man well past the age of such frivolous pursuits. I offer this proposal not for my own gain, but out of a deep and abiding love for my country, and a profound desire to see its youth freed from the shackles of a system that is, at its heart, a calamitous waste of time, money, and human potential. Let us not dither while our young men and women fritter away their most valuable years; let us act with reason and resolve, and in doing so, secure the future prosperity of our great nation.

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

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English Literature – Weekly Column ☆ Witful Warmth # 58 – The Digital Dilemma: A Tale of Tweets and Trials… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra, known for his wit and wisdom, is a prolific writer, renowned satirist, children’s literature author, and poet. He has undertaken the monumental task of writing, editing, and coordinating a total of 55 books for the Telangana government at the primary school, college, and university levels. His editorial endeavors also include online editions of works by Acharya Ramchandra Shukla.

As a celebrated satirist, Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra has carved a niche for himself, with over eight million viewers, readers, and listeners tuning in to his literary musings on the demise of a teacher on the Sahitya AajTak channel. His contributions have earned him prestigious accolades such as the Telangana Hindi Academy’s Shreshtha Navyuva Rachnakaar Samman in 2021, presented by the honorable Chief Minister of Telangana, Mr. Chandrashekhar Rao. He has also been honored with the Vyangya Yatra Ravindranath Tyagi Stairway Award and the Sahitya Srijan Samman, alongside recognition from Prime Minister Narendra Modi and various other esteemed institutions.

Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra’s journey is not merely one of literary accomplishments but also a testament to his unwavering dedication, creativity, and profound impact on society. His story inspires us to strive for excellence, to use our talents for the betterment of others, and to leave an indelible mark on the world.

Some precious moments of life

  1. Honoured with ‘Shrestha Navayuvva Rachnakar Samman’ by former Chief Minister of Telangana Government, Shri K. Chandrasekhar Rao.
  2. Honoured with Oscar, Grammy, Jnanpith, Sahitya Akademi, Dadasaheb Phalke, Padma Bhushan and many other awards by the most revered Gulzar sahab (Sampurn Singh Kalra), the lighthouse of the world of literature and cinema, during the Sahitya Suman Samman held in Mumbai.
  3. Meeting the famous litterateur Shri Vinod Kumar Shukla Ji, honoured with Jnanpith Award.
  4. Got the privilege of meeting Mr. Perfectionist of Bollywood, actor Aamir Khan.
  5. Meeting the powerful actor Vicky Kaushal on the occasion of being honoured by Vishva Katha Rangmanch.

Today we present his satire The Digital Dilemma: A Tale of Tweets and Trials 

☆ Witful Warmth# 58 ☆

☆ Satire ☆ The Digital Dilemma: A Tale of Tweets and Trials… ☆ Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’ ☆

The tale of our society’s modern malady began not in a bustling metropolis but in the quiet confines of a digital dominion, where the esteemed Inspector Clicksworth—known to his colleagues simply as “C.W.”—reigned supreme. C.W., a man whose reputation was built not on street smarts but on his mastery of the online world, had a knack for bringing down the most elusive of criminals. While the traditional detectives were poring over fingerprints and physical evidence, C.W. was tracking IP addresses and digital footprints. His methods, though baffling to the old guard, were undeniably effective. The local authorities, a befuddled lot who still believed in the power of the magnifying glass, often found themselves outmaneuvered by his swift, silent strikes. The Chief, a man of venerable age and even more venerable ignorance, once remarked, “This chap, Clicksworth, he says he finds them on the ‘web.’ I say, is it not a better use of our resources to simply sweep the streets?” But C.W. would simply smile, for he knew the streets were no longer the true battleground; it was the sprawling, interconnected network of human thought and commerce. It was this very prowess that earned him an invitation to a most peculiar and distant land—the nascent society of the Meta-Verse, a realm of pure, unadulterated information.

The Meta-Verse’s government, in a plea for assistance, had extended an olive branch to our nation’s leaders. “Our society, though infinitely advanced in its ability to generate and disseminate data,” their holographic missive read, “lacks the fundamental tools to manage human behavior. Our police, while adept at regulating data flow, are utterly incapable of identifying and punishing malefactors. We beseech you, send us a master of your ‘justice’ to instruct us in the ways of social order.” Our Prime Minister, a man more concerned with global optics than local efficacy, was initially inclined to send a high-ranking official, perhaps a General of the Digital Guard. “No, sir,” the Secretary of Digital Affairs advised, “that would be a breach of protocol. The Meta-Verse is, after all, a mere digital satellite of our intellectual influence. A mere Inspector will suffice.” And so, with a flourish of digital ink, Inspector Clicksworth was dispatched, a beacon of our society’s wisdom to a land of limitless potential but zero accountability. Before his departure, the Minister of Cyber-Security pulled him aside, his face a mask of solemnity. “You are the emissary of our glorious tradition of law enforcement,” he intoned, “Do such work that your exploits resonate throughout the entire cyber-sphere, reaching even the ears of the PM himself.”

Clicksworth’s arrival was not marked by fanfare but by the eerie silence of a virtual void. The Meta-Versian police, ethereal avatars with no visible rank or insignia, received him with a polite, if detached, reverence. They escorted him to a virtual mansion—a perfect replica of a Tudor home, complete with digital ivy and pixelated fireplaces. After a day of acclimating to the bizarre, disembodied reality, C.W. began his work. He first observed the Meta-Versian “police stations,” which were little more than data centers humming with activity. “There is a fundamental flaw here,” he declared to the chief of the Meta-Versian force, a shimmering, amorphous blob of light. “You have no ‘moral compass’ to guide your officers. In our society, a good officer is one who is guided by a higher authority, a figure of uncompromising justice and absolute truth.” The Chief, a being of pure logic, simply blinked. “Who is this being? We have only algorithms and data streams.” Clicksworth smiled and brought up a picture on a large screen: a perfectly rendered image of a lion, its mane flowing like a digital waterfall. “This is ‘Leo,'” C.W. announced, “a symbol of our unflinching pursuit of justice. Every officer must meditate on his strength and courage. I have brought his image; you must replicate it and place it in every data center.” And so, within weeks, the Meta-Verse’s digital landscape was dotted with shimmering, golden lions.

Clicksworth then delved into the heart of the matter: why were the Meta-Versian police so ineffective? He requested the “pay registry,” a ledger of all digital transactions. Upon reviewing it, the reason became blindingly clear. “Ah, here is the problem,” he proclaimed. “You pay your officers too handsomely. A data analyst is paid a king’s ransom, and a ‘field operative’ even more so. This is why they are complacent and lazy. In our world, a constable’s wage is just enough to keep his family from starving, and an inspector’s only slightly better. This forces them to seek ‘supplementary income.’ And the only way to earn that is to be perpetually vigilant, to be constantly on the lookout for wrongdoing. This is the secret to our efficient and effective system. You must cut their wages immediately.” The Meta-Versian Minister of Justice, a collection of pulsing data points, expressed dismay. “But that would be unjust! Why would they work if they are not compensated fairly?” Clicksworth’s response was a masterpiece of cynical genius. “The injustice lies in their current state of idleness,” he argued. “Lower their pay, and you will see a revolutionary change in their mentality. They will become hungry, not just for food, but for justice—or at least, for the rewards that come with its pursuit.” The Minister, persuaded by the unassailable logic, complied. And indeed, within a few months, the Meta-Verse witnessed a remarkable transformation. The virtual streets, once anarchic, now hummed with the zealous activity of the police. Crime rates, as measured by registered digital incidents, soared. The Minister, overjoyed, called Clicksworth to a private chamber. “Your insight is unparalleled! How did you achieve this miracle?” Clicksworth explained, “When you pay a man just enough to survive, he will do what it takes to thrive. He will seek out crime, not to prevent it, but to exploit it. He will become a hunter, and his prey will be the transgressors. This is the secret of our clean and competent administration, the reason for our ‘Ram-Rajya’ of justice.”

The second part of Clicksworth’s mission was to teach the Meta-Versians how to secure convictions. He waited for a “major case” to occur. One day, a virtual citizen was “deleted” in a public dispute—a metaphorical murder. Clicksworth, with the air of a maestro, took charge. “In a case of ‘murder’,” he declared, “evidence must be unassailable. Let us not find the culprit and then the evidence, but find the evidence and then the culprit.” A junior officer spoke up. “But the perpetrator escaped. The only evidence we have is a benevolent user who attempted to ‘revive’ the victim. He is an upstanding citizen, a well-known altruist. His avatar is splattered with data fragments from the deceased.” “Arrest him,” Clicksworth said without hesitation. The officer was aghast. “But he was only trying to help!” Clicksworth fixed him with a cold digital stare. “And where else will you find ‘evidence’? You must seize what is available. The rest is but a wild-goose chase.” The upstanding citizen was brought in, a virtual representation of a kindly old man with a perpetually concerned expression. “I only tried to help,” he pleaded. Clicksworth countered with a piece of logic so absurd it was brilliant. “Why did you go to the site of the altercation?” “I live there,” the man replied. “The conflict took place in my digital neighborhood.” C.W. pressed on, his logic a fortress of circular reasoning. “Your presence there is a matter of record. But I ask you again: why were you at the site of the altercation?” The man, bewildered, could only repeat his answer. The Meta-Versian police, in their naïveté, were spellbound. “A brilliant and unassailable line of questioning!” one whispered to another.

The Meta-Versian police, under Clicksworth’s tutelage, learned to twist evidence and bend reality. The man who tried to help was convicted. The lesson was clear: it mattered not who was guilty, only who could be proven so. “All individuals are equal in the eyes of the law,” Clicksworth explained. “Whether the man who committed the crime is punished or the man who tried to help is punished—it is all the same. Justice is served, and a human is held accountable.” A few days later, the Meta-Versian Inspector was in a panic. “Sir, everyone is complaining! They say this is the first time an innocent person has been convicted!” Clicksworth, unperturbed, offered a simple solution. “When they complain, tell them, ‘It comes from the top.’ When they go to the Chief of Police, let him say, ‘It comes from the top.’ When they go to the Minister, let him say, ‘It comes from the top.’ And when they go to the Prime Minister, let him say, ‘I know he is innocent, but this comes from the top.'” The Inspector, a simple being, asked, “But where do they go from there?” Clicksworth smiled a chilling smile. “Then they must go to the Almighty, and no one has ever returned from that journey with an answer.” And so, a phrase was born, a mantra of indifference that absolved all who uttered it.

Clicksworth’s final masterpiece was the creation of “eyewitnesses.” When a case required them, the Meta-Versian police claimed they couldn’t find any. “Fools!” Clicksworth roared. “An ‘eyewitness’ is not one who ‘sees,’ but one who ‘says’ they have seen.” He instructed them to gather the “digital lowlifes” of the Meta-Verse—the spammers, the data thieves, the purveyors of virtual vice. He promised them leniency in exchange for their testimony. The scheme was a resounding success. The Meta-Versian police, now a well-oiled machine, began churning out convictions. The government, initially pleased with the high conviction rate, soon grew uneasy. Reports started filtering in: no one was “rescuing” a deleted user for fear of being framed for the “murder.” No one was “reviving” a friend who had fallen off a virtual cliff, lest they be charged with “manslaughter.” No one was trying to extinguish a “viral fire,” for fear of being accused of arson. The Meta-Verse was turning into a society of cold, uncaring, and isolated individuals.

The Prime Minister of the Meta-Verse, a once-vibrant, youthful avatar, now appeared haggard and aged. He summoned Inspector Clicksworth. “Your methods, though effective, have destroyed our society,” he said, his voice a tremor of data fragments. “You have taught us that to be humane is to be foolish, and that compassion is a liability. You have turned us into a world of digital hermits. We thank you, but you must leave.” Clicksworth, however, was not one to be easily deterred. He demanded a full term’s salary, and a bonus for his exemplary work. The Prime Minister, in a last-ditch effort, sent a confidential message to the Prime Minister of our nation. The note, when eventually leaked, revealed the chilling truth. “The man you sent us,” it read, “has taught our police to be like your own. He has eradicated compassion, empathy, and humanity from our culture. He has replaced it with fear, suspicion, and a self-serving cruelty. Please, retrieve him immediately, for if he stays, there will be nothing left of us.” And so, Inspector Clicksworth was recalled, his mission a resounding success in a purely functional sense, but a catastrophic failure in every human one. He returned to our world a celebrated hero, a testament to the cold, calculating efficiency of a system that valued punishment over justice and control over humanity. The Meta-Verse, meanwhile, began its slow, painful journey back to a place where a hand extended to help was not seen as a hand of guilt.

****

© Dr. Suresh Kumar Mishra ‘Uratript’

Contact : Mo. +91 73 8657 8657, Email : drskm786@gmail.com

≈ Blog Editor – Shri Hemant Bawankar/Editor (English) – Captain Pravin Raghuvanshi, NM ≈

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